By Tara E. Buck
News-Post Staff
FREDERICK -- At Mount Olivet Cemetery, near the World War II memorial, is a tall stone shaped like a basketball hoop.
"Devoted son, brother, grandson, nephew, friend and teammate," proclaims the marker above the grave of George Lane Boerstler Jr.
Lane, as he was known to friends and family, played basketball for Linganore High School, and when he died his family wanted his tombstone to reflect the passion of his life.
George Boerstler and his wife picked red granite to mark their son's grave because Lane had red hair, they said in a recent interview.
Lane, who was born July 10, 1964, was diagnosed with leukemia in 1986, and spent much of his remaining months of his life at Johns Hopkins University Hospital. He received what was, at that time, an experimental bone marrow transplant.
Despite doctors' efforts, Lane died on May 19, 1987.
Lane was known as "Sparky" to his friends, his father said, partly because of his red hair but mostly because he was a leader who could put spark back in the teams he played on.
"Lane lived fast, played hard, died young, a victim of leukemia," the stone above his grave says. "He was an inspiration to us all."
Personal touch
More and more tombstones in today's cemeteries are witness to the inspiration the people buried beneath them instilled in their families and friends. The monument industry today offers an increasingly wider variety of styles and items to include as permanent memorials to a life, many that may surprise those who haven't visited a cemetery recently.
"Memorials are for the living," according to Memorialdisplay.com, a Web site sponsored by Memorial Display Concepts, Inc. "They are a vital part of the grieving process and are of great benefit to families in dealing with the death of a loved one. With today's modern stone technology, families have even greater freedom to personalize a monument or memorial for their loved one."
Personalize they have.
A stroll through most area cemeteries reveals stones that tell not only who is buried below, but things that characterize the deceased -- the family farm, a dump truck, a favorite sports team.
With the advent of computers, virtually anything can be etched onto stone, said Mike Dixon, a Maryland Humanities Council lecturer on cemetery history and traditions.
"You see perfect depictions of farms, animals, pets, their occupation. There's an old Methodist cemetery in Kent County that has, sitting next to a modern stone, an old firefighter's helmet and coat. That was very important to him," Mr. Dixon said.
As attitudes about memorials change, some burials are even taking on a bit of humor.
Mr. Dixon noted a stone near Newark, Del., that states, "I told you I was sick."
"You wonder what kind of humor that person must have had in life," he said.
In Frederick's Mount Olivet, the stone marking the grave of Beulah M. Smith (Dec. 25, 1912 to April 6, 1994), includes an engraving of a rocking chair and proclaims: "Just resting."
At the Fairmont Cemetery near Libertytown, a grave proclaims its resident to have been "Gene Autry's Number One Fan."
The right stone
"When he passed on," Mr. Boerstler said of his son Lane, "we went to various cemeteries, trying to look at tombstones that we might like, but there was nothing I could buy that would represent his life.
"We checked everywhere but everything was the basic, slab-type tombstones. It ended up we went to Lough's (Memorial Service in Frederick) and I worked with them."
Mr. Boerstler made an exact cardboard depiction of the basketball hoop in the size he and his wife, Angel, wanted for the stone marking Lane's grave.
"We added number 12, which was his number at Linganore."
The Boerstlers were pleased with the result. "It took them a long time but they did a pretty good job," he said of the monument makers.
While speaking about the stone, Mr. Boerstler admitted it had "been a long time" since Lane died. In talking about the stone, he began to also share Lane's personality traits and accomplishments.
"He played all sports," Mr. Boerstler said. "He was probably noted most for his basketball prowess. But he was 'All This,' and 'All That' all over," he said of Lane's selection to all-star teams. "Pretty well everyone knew who he was in high school sports."
Lane achieved membership in Linganore High School's prestigious 400 point club for basketball.
"He was such a fighter," Mr. Boerstler said.
Honoring an officer
At Mount Olivet, a stone not far from the Boerstler marker shows, in detailed relief, the form of a uniformed and smiling police officer.
Charles K. "Bubbie" Cashour (Aug. 23, 1933 to Oct. 18, 1985), worked for more than 28 years as a Frederick Police Department officer.
His widow, Mary Catherine Cashour, said recently she felt compelled to honor her husband in the way most city residents would remember him: In his police uniform.
"As a policeman he made a great impact on the people of Frederick city and, being the caring person he was, he devoted his life to protecting those citizens," Mrs. Cashour said. "I thought it was fitting and proper for him to be remembered for his life's work."
Mrs. Cashour said her husband did not die in the line of duty, but from a ruptured aorta that caused his passing to be sudden but painless.
"We were leaving that morning for a trip and we were going with some friends to Corning, N.Y., and he had not complained about anything that morning and when our friends came, he went out and loaded some things in the trailer. When he came back inside, he sat down and looked like he took three breaths and then he was gone," Mrs. Cashour said. "He didn't have a chance."
"But being a policeman was his life," she said. "He truly loved what he did. He's such a caring person and any older officers on the force or people who had been around him would tell you that."
Beyond words
While carved likenesses are still unusual in cemeteries today, photo images are now common additions to tombstones and grave markers. Most such photographs are in color and provide an image of the deceased in good health, spirits and appearance.
Today's plots increasingly include other items besides tombstones: Ceramic pots with perennial flowers, perpetual lights, weather-proof memory boxes, benches and often at children's graves, toys.
At the Pine Grove Chapel and Cemetery in Mount Airy, there's the grave of Bryson Neel Flora (Nov. 27, 1990 to Jan. 21, 2000). The stone depicts a wooded scene with a dog, but includes a photo of Bryson in his youth soccer uniform. A bench placed beside the site gives visitors a place to sit and rest.
"Forever in our hearts," Bryson's tombstone reads.
Some have left Matchbox cars and G.I. Joe figures at the spot.
Technology and trends
John Kinnaird, a fifth-generation memorial maker with R.S. Kinnaird Memorials in Thurmont, said recently new technology has allowed for more options on tombstones.
"There are trends in monuments just as in cars or anything else. And people put all kinds of photographs on of their pet, house, almost anything you can think of, people want etched," he said.
Mr. Kinnaird said his company has offered the newer options for much longer than most memorial services because it has had the cutting-edge technology for the past 16 years. His firm was one of the first six or seven companies in the country to incorporate it.
He said laser technology, available for about 10 years, has improved the range and quality of the images carved in stone.
"We did other etching before that but it was originally all done free hand," Mr. Kinnaird said. That kind of work can be seen on the Vietnam Veterans Memorial that Mr. Kinnaird's company made for Frederick's Memorial Park.
Mr. Kinnaird said a computerized stencil cutter is also a tool his firm has used in recent years. It allows virtually all design and preparation work to be done on a computer.
While the technology is new, some of the modern trends are actually just updated practices of times past.
"Photographs (on tombstones) actually go right back to the turn of the century," he said. "At some older cemeteries in Baltimore and Washington, you'll see hundreds of them. They fell out of favor for some years but now, with ink jet printers, you can print right onto ceramic disks and then they're fired (in a kiln). Now you can get full color images."
The shape of the stone itself gives people a way to remember the departed. Mr. Kinnaird said his company was recently commissioned to do a stone in the shape of a guitar.
"Some people will get them shaped like cars or trucks and some people will really personalize them," he said. "As with everything else, it gives us another avenue to go down" in terms of offering more options to a grieving family.
Mr. Kinnaird said sales of traditional stones are keeping pace with the more modern markers. "A lot of people lean toward the traditional ... because they are traditional," he said.
But for those who "want to make more of a statement or do something different," there is "all the new etching" and other techniques that make a tombstone more than a slab chiseled with "R.I.P."
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