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Welcome
Taphophilia (dot) Com...
A repository of morbid curiosities:
Thanatology and Taphophile Issues, Cemetery,
Funeral Industry and Death Related News.
A Taphophilia Thank You...
Taphophilia (dot) Com would not be possible without the knowledge, experience and talent of DarkestWeb. From its conception and early development, DarkestWeb was faced with many challenges; from inspiring and motivating, to providing guidance and direction. The continued dedication and support has produced results greater than ever expected, and for this, I owe a huge debt of gratitude.
Announcements
Graveyards of Chicago:
The People, History, Art, and Lore of Cook County Cemeteries
By Matt Hucke And Ursula Bielski. Discover a Chicago That Exists Just Beneath the Surface - About Six Feet Under! Take a tour of Chicago's permanent residents! Please visit the Lake Claremont Press website to purchase your copy of Graveyards of Chicago today!
Green-Wood Cemetery Arcadia Publishing announces the release of Alexandra Mosca's historic account of one of New York's most famous cemeteries. Aracdia Publishing's Images of America series has an extensive catalog of many cemetery publications! Please visit Arcadia Publishing to purchase your copy of Green-Wood Cemetery and to browse other available titles!
Men of Mortuaries Calendar
To purchase your 2008 calendar, learn more about the KAMMCARES Foundation, or to be featured in the 2009 calendar, please visit Men of Mortuaries.
Epitaphs: The Magazine for Cemetery Lovers By Cemetery Lovers
For information regarding subscriptions, single issues, submission guidelines, deadlines, classifieds or advertising for future issues, please visit The Cemetery Club.
Guardians of the Soul: Angels and Innocents, Mourners and Saints, Indiana's remarkable cemetery sculpture
with photography by John Bower and foreword by Claude Cookman is now
available. Please visit
Studio Indiana for more information.
West Springfield Massachusetts: Stories Carved in Stone by Rusty Clark features information on early New England gravestone carvers with more than two hundred photos and illustrations. Please visit the Dog Pond Press website.
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Elisabeth Kubler-Ross bet on sure thing: Death |
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Written by DeadGirl
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Tuesday, 07 September 2004 |
Connie Cone Sexton
The Arizona Republic
Sept. 7, 2004
Psychiatrist Elisabeth Kubler-Ross got her passion down on paper. Time and again, through more than 20 books, she challenged readers to dwell on the uncomfortable. The looming unknown.
That sure thing called death.
From her landmark On Death and Dying in 1969, she followed with titles like Death: The Final Stage of Growth, To Live Until We Say Goodbye, On Children and Death and The Wheel of Life: A Memoir of Living and Dying.
Aghast that so many doctors were not willing to honestly discuss the aspects of death with their patients, Kubler-Ross decided to take her message to the masses. Along the way, she sold millions of books and became an international icon, a champion for the needs of the terminally ill.
With her death Aug. 24 in Scottsdale at age 78, how will her words live on?
For Stephen Connor, vice president of the National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization in Alexandria, Va., there is no question her mission will continue.
"She brought the taboo notion of death and dying into the public consciousness," he said.
She made it possible to have the conversation about death, he said. "She said dying can be the best part of your life and that there is a possibility for growth."
On Death and Dying became a popular cultural phenomenon with her theory that those who are dying experience five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
While her theory of the stages drew praise from some in the medical field, Connor was one to be a bit critical of that part of her work.
"I've said there were better models that came out of her book, but the fact is she was the first one to put it out there. She was truly a pioneer in many respects, and her work will have a lasting impact."
Connor was one of the hundreds who attended the memorial Saturday for Kubler-Ross. Each person was handed a program containing five of her quotes. Connor reflects on each:
"The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love."
Connor: This quote is really one of the fundamental things about hospice care that makes it unique. It really comes from a humanistic philosophy.
From our experience, when we accept patients at the end of life unconditionally, it opens them up in a way. It helps them begin to work out their unfinished issues. It takes the kind of environment of unconditional love to feel free enough to resolve the places they're holding on to that are painful for them.
Hospices and hospice workers do that pretty routinely. We see people in all sorts of social strata, and we have to honor them and accept them. We hear people say they hadn't really lived until they were dying. It finally freed them to be authentic human beings. They dropped the pretense.
"We make progress in society only if we stop cursing and complaining about its shortcomings and have the courage to do something about them."
Connor: The lesson here was Elisabeth seeing how awful the care was of hospital patients in the 1950s. She was way ahead of everybody in terms of that. People are quick to complain, but you really have to do something to change the system. That's what got her in a lot of trouble with the medical profession for speaking her mind. She was a very assertive woman, and there is difference between being angry and assertive.
She was very focused, very intent on changing things, not to suffer the status quo. We still have problems with the care of people who are dying, but we have made great improvements.
"Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself and know that everything in this life has a purpose."
Connor: I think she's actually talking to the people working with the dying as well as the dying. There are two things.
One, when you're working and helping someone facing death, it's not about you. Telling people there's a right way to die would not be effective.
Two, dying patients are ultimately trying to find meaning in their lives. Why was I here? In order to find that purpose, you do have to shut out the distraction and the noise. It's easy to get caught up in the details and the treatment.
She felt that none of this was random and a mistake and that each of us had our own individual meaning. To find it would be to focus and allow yourself to get down to the ordinary.
"When we have passed the tests that we were sent to Earth to learn, we are allowed to graduate. We are allowed to shed our bodies, which imprison our souls."
Connor: There were quite a few comments at her service about her graduation. If anything, her annoyance in recent years was that she was being taught patience. She wanted to leave quite awhile ago.
I don't know I've known very many people who were so thoroughly convinced in their belief of the continuity of life. She was absolutely convinced. She felt she had seen the other side."
"Death can show us the way, for when we understand that our time on this Earth is limited and that we have no way of knowing when it will be over, then we must live each day as if it were the only one we had."
Connor: She was using death as the teacher, the notion that we have to live in the here and now and keep our unfinished business to a minimum. Any of us could walk out tomorrow and get hit by a truck so we should be present in the moment and live fully.
http://www.azcentral.com/arizonarepublic/local/articles/0907b2life-ross07.html |
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Taphophilia?
taphophilia (taf′ō-fil′ē-ă)
ORIGIN:
From the Greek words taphos, meaning "tomb" or "sepulcher" and philia, meaning "attraction or affinity to something, in particular the love or obsession with something"
DEFINITION: 1. An excessive interest in graves and cemeteries. 2. A love or fondness for funerals, graves, and cemeteries. 3. In psychiatry, a morbid attraction to graves and cemeteries
Quote Repository
“Death is more universal than life; everyone dies but not everyone lives.” A Sachs
Shirtless and Sculpted
The Men of Mortuaries 2008 Calendar is now available! All sale proceeds benefit KAMMCARES, a breast cancer foundation.
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